The End of the Race – What’s Next?

My son Kyle has been home from his World Race Gap Year journey for about 3 months now.  If you would like to read about his journey, here is the link: KylePetersen.theworldrace.org.  He had an amazing nine months living in community with his team (family).  I can honestly say that he is not the same young man that he was when he left.  The maturity, love and conviction that have come to the surface in my child amaze me every day.  God is calling him to train to be a leader and go back on the race as a leader.  I’m excited for him to have a picture of what the next step looks like as he follows that vision.

The race was a time of growing, of living in community with purpose, being vulnerable, available and stretched.  Kyle misses the community living and the deep relationships that come from being together 24/7.  I listen as he struggles to assimilate back to the busy American culture of more work than adventure.  I know that there were hard times on the race but now looking back those are faint memories as the joy filled days of constant people are what he longs for.  He thinks that no one can understand what he is feeling – the grief, the loss, the longing, the void, the anticipation of the next step.

As I listen to my 21 year old son, I find myself relating in many ways to all of those feelings.  My youngest child just graduated high school and we have an empty nest to face in the next few years.  I would have never dreamed in the beginning that we would choose the route of homeschooling our kids but that is where God lead us.  Over 21 years ago I left the work place to be a stay home Mom – to lead and disciple my tribe.  We did a radical thing when we walked away from traditional school to learn at home.  Our goal from the beginning was to parent with purpose, to be vulnerable, to be a safe place for our kids to grow in who their were meant to be, to love them unconditionally, to make the most amazing memories together and to point our kids to Christ.  Oh there were hard days, but when I look back I long for the joy filled days of living in community 24/7.  There is a richness in my relationship with my kids that has come from a common journey – and now this portion of the journey is over.  I couldn’t be prouder of the journeys that each of my 4 children are on, we have done our job to the best of our ability and God has blessed it.  Their individual Kingdom journeys are just beginning, and yes they will intertwine with mine often, but it will never be the same as those relaxed precious moments of learning on the couch day after day.

As much as I grieve the loss of that sweet time we have shared as a family, what I am really feeling is an uncertainty of what the future holds.  My husband and I need to have community with a “tribe” of like minded people.  We don’t want to live to pay the bills and fall into bed exhausted without connecting on a relational level with anyone.  We are created to be in relationship and the busier I get the emptier I feel.  I’m not looking to parent all over again – that season is finished.  I am waiting on God to show us the next step for us as a couple.  In the meantime we are building into young adults in our life – encouraging them to live out their faith in a radical way.  The blessing of being around young adults is that their passion rubs off on us and inspires us to continue to grow in our own Kingdom journey.

Unqualified

If you would have told me a year ago that this winter I would be sitting in a conference room with 100 other people that I had just met, most of them my age or older, getting ready to go into “Girly” bars in the Philippines, I would have thought you were crazy.  Looking around the room, with butterflies in my stomach, I couldn’t help but wonder,”God, What are You doing?”  Unqualified was the word that came to mind as I looked at myself and the other parents that would probably prefer to be heading to bed at 9pm rather than hitting the bar scene.  This wasn’t any bar strip either but a famous place for sexual tourism.  I was about to enter the unknown darkness with my husband and 20 year old son.  Our job was to go into these bars as missionaries with an organization called Wipe Every Tear  (http://wipeeverytear.org/).

Wipe Every Tear offers safe housing and an education for the girls that are trapped in this world of sexual slavery.  We met girls that are living in the safe houses already – girls with dreams, girls that giggle, girls that like all the same things my daughter likes, girls that now have hope.  Since coming to the safe houses they have been introduced to Jesus and the transformation is beautiful.  They now know the love of their Father and the joy pours out of them.  Some of these same girls would be our guides for the nights, only able to go into the bars because they are with us “tourists”.   The girl that lead our team was so humble and sweet, this was her first time out alone and she was as nervous as we were.  I felt like a mama bear in protection mode as we headed into the very place she left.  I couldn’t get over how proud I was of this brave young lady – no one was forcing her to go back.  She knew first hand how hard it would be for these girls to believe that this opportunity was for real.  The bars have a picture of the woman who runs the safe houses displayed in the back rooms of these bars with a warning not to go with her… putting fear in these girls that life with this woman would be worse than what they would be leaving.  Our guides bravely go in to tell their story and dismiss the fear that this is too good to be true.

Here is where we come in, the group of unqualified Americans completely out of our comfort zone.  To even get a chance to talk to these girls we need to step onto their turf, to choose a girl from the stage, buy them a drink and spend time talking with them about their dreams, their life, their future.  Most of the girls we talked to have children – which are welcome at the safe houses.  None of the girls we talked to ordered an alcoholic drink – they just wanted juice or chocolate milk.  None of the girls we talked to enjoyed what they did but rather endured it for the sake of their family.  Some were there because their parents sold them, some because they were lied to and thought it was a waitress job, all were from poverty and had no means to an education.  All were made in the image of God and deserving of dignity.

Our goal for the night was to bring God’s Kingdom into the streets, to offer hope to those trapped in some of the darkest places you can ever imagine.  God loves to use the unqualified, He shows that over and over in scripture.  It isn’t about my ability or lack there of, it’s all about the power of God.  These young woman that were willing to be our guides were evident of that.  Before we headed out to the streets THEY prayed over US.  God used the hands of girls that used to make money on the streets.  He used the hands of lady boys that have been groomed since early years to be used, but now are set free.  God showed his power and sent out a bunch of middle age parents and their young adult kids to love on the girls of Walking Street.  I’m thankful God chose to use me – an unqualified, middle age woman who was willing to say “Yes”.

PC:  Wipe Every Tear

 

 

Loving beyond Labels

I’ve been thinking about labels lately.  My first thought was that I really don’t like being labeled.  I wondered if my dislike for labels goes along with my dislike in being told what to do.  Somehow it seems that if you are labeled it takes away your freedom to break out of how other people think of you  by your  label.  I realize it’s a bit more complex because in truth labels help us understand in just a few words what makes a person unique.  Labels can bring compassion:  orphan, widow – with just a word we understand that there has been a loss and we give grace.  It wasn’t that long ago that the word refugee had the same effect.  Where once our hearts were stirred with providing protection for people who have lost everything, experienced tragic emotional and physical abuse beyond what any human deserves to go though, now the same label provokes fear and anger.  The faces no longer haunt us when we chose to look at a generalization, grouping people into a label that might not even be defined correctly.  There is evil in the world and there are definitely terrorists but to equate refugee to terrorists is a stretch at the very least.

When I think of some of the labels that I can fit under:  American, wife, Homeschool mom, Caucasian, Christian etc, I wonder what comes to the mind of the reader?  Depending on where in the world you live you could hear “American” and think immoral (from tv) or gun slinging, crude, proud, I doubt you envision a middle age woman sitting by her fireplace, reading her Bible and dreaming of making a difference in this world.  A label does not do justice because it is skewed by our perception.  The only way that we can get to the heart of a person is by building a relationship with them.  If I put someone in a box, a label, with my own narrow view as the definition, I miss seeing the beautiful diverse world that God has created.  I miss being a part of something so much bigger than anything I could figure out on my own.

It’s the season of Advent – we are waiting and anticipating the arrival of Christ.  The prophets told of a coming Messiah.  That label, Messiah, gave the Jewish people great hope.  That same label gave King Herod great fear which lead to him murdering a whole generation of baby boys.  God spared Jesus by showing Mary and Joseph through a vision to flee.  I wonder how many other families were able to flee the wickedness of King Herod’s pride?  As refugees did their host country of Egypt accept them?  Did they live on barely enough food to stay alive as refugees in camps all over the world do today?  Did they wonder if they would ever get a chance to go home again?  I wonder if their experience being refugees shaped how Jesus saw the broken and hurting around him?  Is that why he said,  “Whatever you do for the least of these, you do for me.”? (Matthew 25:40)

I don’t think that it’s reasonable to say we should do away with labels, they serve a purpose.  I also don’t think we will ever go back to a time when everyone within miles of you looked like you, believed as you, spoke your language, ate the same food…. our world is closing in with different cultures right at our door.  It’s time to step out of our comfort zone, take a step towards learning about our neighbors, caring for them as people made in the image of Christ.  I think as I take time to understand, to see beyond the labels or preconceived ideas I may have, I will be the one richer for entering in on the journey of another.  Maybe by being a friend, the labels and preconceived ideas they may have about me will fall away too.  I do know that if all I see is a label, I will miss an opportunity to see the person that I’m sure has as many labels to live under as I do.  As people we are so complex, created after a God that is even more complex.  When I try to imagine who God is I look at the Bible and it’s labels… and even then I get but a glimpse of what an amazing God He is.

Isaiah 9:6 “For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”